Everyone who has seen one of the famous RomCom’s; Sleepless in Seattle, Love Actually, Hitch, The Proposal, or Pretty Woman, knows that the best way to win over a woman’s heart is through a grand act of love. Although I do believe that there is definitely a time and a place for these grand acts of love, I believe is it’s the small things that make a lasting love. One example of a grand act of love would be a proposal. This is a life event that will only happen one time. Therefore, you need to make it a moment she’ll never forget. I am proud of my proposal to my wife. She is still proud to tell the story to anyone who asks. Ok, if you must know stay tuned for another post, because this is about small ways to show love. Munia Khan once said, “Dust is the parent of a star.” Just as dust parents a star consistent small acts of love parent unconditional and true love.
The little things? The little moments? They aren’t so little. Jon Kabatt Zinn
There are two strategies to solving how to know what will make the biggest impact on your significant other. The first strategy is to know what are some of the stressors in their life. Maybe they aren’t even stressors, but they are little things that they do not enjoy doing. A few examples would be filling up the car with gas, taking out the trash, preparing and packing their lunch, and many other mundane tasks. If you don’t know what they do not enjoy, then observe them completing these tasks and take note of their positive or negative reaction. Then figure out how you can help by occasionally completing these tasks. This will have a huge impact because not only will you completing this task, but it will allow them more time to do other things which they actually enjoy
- Filling their car up with gas
- Taking out the trash
- Feeding/Picking up after an animal
- Doing the dishes
- Preparing and packing lunches
- Cleaning the house
- Grocery shopping
The second strategy is a bit different and is very similar to positive reinforcement. You need to know what brings your significant other joy, and then surprise them with these items or actions. I know that I love a good surprise, especially when it’s something that I enjoy. As a reminder, these don’t have to be huge gifts, and they shouldn’t be large gifts. They need to be little things. For example, I remember watching a news story on how a 90-year-old man still brings his wife flowers every Monday. We all need to take a page from this man’s book. He has brought his wife flowers every Monday since they have been married. If you have a monthly budget, which I highly recommended, then simply build this into your budget. If you want your relationship to continue to grow, you must invest in it. Gents, I challenge you to start surprising your significant other. Then find our what they like and make it a routine.
- Coffee in the morning
- Alone/quiet time
- New books
- Food (most of the time sweets)
- Gift Cards
- Hand-written notes
“Enjoy the little things for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.”
The brilliant artist of Starry Night, Vincent Von Gough once said, “Great things are done by a series of small things brought together”. This is how I view relationships and marriages. All of the little acts of love come together to create the greater love story of your relationship. So gentlemen, figure out what stresses your significant others, take it off their plate, figure out what brings them joy and then surprise them with those things! Remember, that the little things aren’t so little.
How do you show your significant other that you love them?
How do you wish your significant other showed you that they love you?